Vineyard Muscatine

I count everything.  Everything.

I know it takes 20 more steps to walk between Fourth and Fifth Streets on Iowa Avenue than there are on any other block from the Mississippi River to my house.   I know the alley next to my home is three steps narrower than the alley on Fifth and Fourth Streets and six steps narrower than the one on Third Street.  When I worked at a restaurant in town it was 9 steps from my work table to the display case.  Ten steps to the sink.  My bed is four steps from the door.  

I know without looking there are six pens, two highlighters and two scissors in the pencil cup on my desk.  What color are the highlighters?   I don't have any idea.  I count and that's all.

Why do I do this?  I have no idea.  But I've been doing it as long as I can remember.  

I might have a disorder of some kind.

What do I do with this information?  Well, it should be obvious to you that I blog about it.  It's absolutely useless information.  My mind is full of it.  (What was the new sports craze in Europe at the time of Jonah (of the "big fish" fame)?   That's right!   Ice skating.)  See???  What could I ever do with that knowledge?   Blog.

Moving on...

Counting seems... mundane.   Only bean counters should count.  Hence the name "bean counter."  

Unless...you happen to be God.  He thinks quite highly of counting.  It's how He shows us He loves us.  

Luke 12:6-7 from the Message Bible tells us "What's the price of two or three pet canaries? Some loose change, right? But God never overlooks a single one. And he pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail--even numbering the hairs on your head! So don't be intimidated by all this bully talk. You're worth more than a million canaries. 

The number of the hairs on my head... and that number changes daily.  But that's how important I am to Him.  And so are you.  He counts the things we would consider to be so little, so trivial, there's no need to know that number.   He knows how many hairs you have and what color they should really be.  Something that is the least noteworthy about us is something important to Him.

Like knowing it takes 284 steps from my office to my front door.  Who cares about that number?  Except God.

He cares about you and what happens to you.  Every.   Little.   Detail.   Nothing is outside of His attention to detail when it comes to His beloved... you.  He hasn't forgotten you... or me... for one moment.  

You can count on it.

You would think there are certain things about myself that would be so ingrained in me that I wouldn't have to think twice before making a decision that affects my ability to sleep.

Case in point:  when someone offers me a cup of full-caff coffee at 9;30 p.m., I should know enough to say "no thanks" instead of worrying that perhaps she made that pot of coffee because she thought I wanted some.  I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

What was I thinking?  

Here I am at 2:19 a.m. typing a blog just because I thought "hey, as long as I'm up, I should get something done instead of watching an infomercial."  (I don't do infomercials.)  Wait.... did I say typing a blog?  No... I'm typing a week's worth.  I might as well.  I'm wide awake.  (You can save these things as drafts so.... why not?)

I should be smarter than that.  I am smarter than that.  

So why didn't I do the thing I knew I should do?  

Paul got  it.  He understood how difficult it is to do the right thing.  This is Romans 7:14-15 from the Message Bible  What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise. So if I can't be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God's command is necessary.

I know what to do.  But I cannot do it.  I decide one way, but act another.   Drinking coffee when I know I shouldn't.  Why?   Well, it tastes good and I like it.  But I KNOW better.  I need guidance.  Lots of it.

And there is only one place that guidance should come from as I am obviously incapable of making wise decisions all by myself.   But that's ok.   I'm good with God being the one who gets to be in control.  

He knows I shouldn't have caffeine after noon.  I need to remember to listen to Him more. 

There is an uproar lately about the Girl Scouts of America and the allegation that they are an arm of the pro-abortion agenda.   I'm not going to go there.  I'm just using this as a jumping off place.

I used to be a Brownie (just a minute.... have to check the smile in my pocket), a Girl Scout, I used to be a Daisy (kindergarten Girl Scout) leader and all of my girls were Daisies.  Some were Brownies, too.  I was the leader of the Girl Scout Cookie Sale for two troops in Muscatine in the early 90's.  (You get to be the cookie drive coordinator when you miss the meeting.)   I know the Girl Scouts.  

Are they more liberal than they were in the 60's when I was a Girl Scout?  Probably.  

Should we be taking a stance against the Girl Scouts because they are liberal?  Well, let's see what the Bible has to say about it.   You know the Bible has a stance on everything.

And here it is... Matthew 12:30 Anyone who isn't with me opposes me, and anyone who isn't working with me is actually working against me

We want to live in God's will.  Of course we do. 


Let's start with the easiest thing the Bible tells us to do if we want to live a Godly way of life.

I Thessalonians 5 tells us to do these things:
16  Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s  will for you in Christ Jesus.

Rejoice when things look great.  Or bleak. 
Pray continually:  God do you want me to do this?  Or that?   
Give thanks in all circumstances.  That means when things look great.  Or bleak.  When God wants you to do this.  Or that. 

The devil only has a few tools to work against us.  The reason for that is that the few tools he has work great.  He doesn't need any more than that.


The enemy of our souls wants us to worry.  He wants us to fret.  Notice the difference between living in God's will and the way our enemy wants us to live.

It's impossible to rejoice and worry at the same time.
We cannot pray continually when we're caught in the mire of fretting.
No one can give thanks and be afraid continuously.  It cannot be done.

So.... the question here probably doesn't need to be asked, but... I will anyway.

Which one do you want to follow?  Let's review.

God's way:  rejoice.  pray.  give thanks.  be in God's will.
The enemy's way:  worry.  fret.   worry some more.

Seems like a no-brainer, doesn't it?  

Rejoice always.   Even when you would rather moan and groan.
Pray.  God knows what's best.  Ask Him.
Give thanks.  When it looks like the enemy is winning, give thanks because God will ultimately win.  He always does (read the book, it's all in there.)
Be in God's will.  

That's it in a nutshell. 

To my precious family.     My wonderful friends.  Those who just happened to stumble upon this today.  Be of good cheer.

God is on your side.

I found a recipe online for a chocolate frosting that was... oh.  so.  good.  Two pounds of melted semisweet chocolate, two pounds of powdered sugar, one pound of sweet cream butter and a cup of heavy cream just because we can.    Beat it into a smooth, creamy, chocolate-y bowl of deliciousness and then take a tiny taste with a spoon. 

Somewhere, somehow a choir of one hundred people will break into lovely six-part harmony on the syllable "ahhhhh" while you melt into a chocolate-induced stupor.

Two weeks before I die I am going to make a huge double-batch of this frosting and then continue to eat one-half cup portions every day until we are both gone.  It wouldn't be a wise choice to eat this frosting too often until you're sure it will no longer affect your longevity.   This frosting is heart-attack-on-an-offset-spatula.

Here's my problem.   I have no idea what day is the first day of my final two weeks.

And therein lies the problem of all humanity, isn't it?  We have no idea how long we have to live on this earth. 

The Bible tells us we have a certain number of days, but only God knows how many days there will be in all. 

It's easy to take our days for granted.  To live as though we will never die and to act as though there will always be more time. 

I, for one, am glad God doesn't tell us when our final day will be.  I would live my life in a different way if I knew how much longer I had.   If I knew when my final two weeks were about to begin, I would live the rest of my days being selfish.  Doing only what I wanted when I wanted with little or no regard to living the way I should.  Then when the final two weeks began I would make everything right with God. 

I didn't say it was right.  I said it's what I would do.  I am, after all, a person who is fully human.  Fully sinful.   But totally forgiven.  It's why I have to live my life prepared for Jesus to come back just for me.  I never know when that day will be so I must always be prepared.

The only drawback.... I'm not sure when to make all of that frosting.  I wouldn't want it to go to waste.  Or waist. 


Psalm 39:4 LORD, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are  numbered--how fleeting my life is.

Last night I was working in the Children's Ministry room while an adult Bible study was going on in the fellowship hall.  I had the television on to watch old Veggie Tales videos as the kids were tired of playing and just wanted to rest a bit.  It was late.  They were tired.

One of the children wanted to watch "Larry Boy" so I found the video tape, that's right, I said tape, as in VHS.  I popped it into the video player, but alas, the tape had not be rewound by the last viewer.  Probably in 1999. 

One of the little boys became quite impatient waiting for the video tape to rewind.  He wanted to watch.  He wanted to watch now.  DVDs have taught our kids we just push a button and the magic of television comes to life.  Videos make us wait. 

The four-year old boy doesn't understand videos.  I don't know if he thought I didn't know what I was doing.... what on earth was taking so long?  He wanted to watch and he let me know as only a young child can (by saying it over and over and over) that he didn't want to wait.  Watch Larry Boy, watch Larry Boy....

I get it.  You want to watch Larry Boy.  

Finally, after what seemed to be a good twenty minutes, the video had rewound and we were able to push the play button.  The television screen was fuzzy for a moment, but finally the Veggie Tales theme song came to life.  The boys danced and sang along.  All was well with the world.  The boys and I were all thankful the tape was ready to play.

Change.  The world of videos has long gone except for the few homes which still have a video player.  In our home we have videos which tout the advent of movies coming in the summer of 1995.  Movies I have long forgotten are still in promo trailers on these relics.  I also have a DVD player and two blue-rays at home.... because they're just better than a VHS player.  And VHS tapes are a little hard to come by lately.

Time marches on.  Things change.   

But not everything changes.   God is the same today as He was thousands of years ago.  His faithfulness, His caring, His love and protection... all exactly the same as they were at the time of Moses.  Abraham.   Adam and Eve. 

His rules haven't changed much either.  Love God the most and love everyone else the way you love yourself.   Loosely paraphrased. 

Although I appreciate change with the advancement of things like Blue-Ray over VHS, I also love the fact that God's love for me never changes.  I cannot do anything that would keep Him from loving me.  It's impossible.  No matter how impatient I become, or how I might tend to ignore Him because I'm swamped at home.... He remains the same. 

I can do absolutely nothing that will put me outside of His ability to love, care and guide me. 

There's a lot of comfort found in that.  He is unchangeable.  And not only that, God is unable to change.  His love never ceases.  His mercy endures from generaton to generation.  His faithfulness... the same yesterday, today and always. 

And for that I am very thankful. 

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the
  heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17. 

Life is not a fairy tale. 

Now that may come as a surprise to some of you.  No Prince Charming on a white charger.  No damsel in distress.  And the reality is no matter what Disney tries to tell you.... no one always has a good hair day.  Especially under water.

But I digress.

In fairy tales, there is always a beautiful princess in some sort of distress.  She finds herself in harm's way.  Or half dead.  And she needs her prince to save her.  He bounds into the room after battling the dragon/witch/evil something and kneels down before her bedside/glass coffin and gives her loves first kiss.  She awakens and then they are happily married for who knows how long.  She becomes more beautiful as the wife of a prince.  No longer in rags.  No longer shabby.

Princes and Princesses aren't much for dating.

His kiss is all the wooing she needs.  After all, he's hot.  And... let's face it...he's a prince.  There just aren't that many princes to go around.

But don't women love to be wooed?  We want someone to come and "fix" the heart that has been broken too many times.   We want the perfect man to awaken us from the slumber into which our emotions have fallen because we're sure there is no such thing as perfect love.  Our hearts ache for the affirmation that we are loved.

And He's there.  Waiting.  Unlike the princes in our fairy tales, this Prince never barges in without an invitation.  That invitation has been written on our hearts.  An invitation to be wooed away to a life of romance by the One who holds you as His most precious treasure.

Not a fairy tale, but a real romance of Someone who loves you more than He loved His own life.   By Someone who one day wants to take you home to meet His Father. 

Jesus is calling you to be the beautiful princess... to cultivate the beauty that is within you and to show that beauty to others.  As a prince shows off his princess. 

He is calling to bring you to a place of deep, intimate relationship with Him.  To know Him in a way that develops the beauty within you.   The relationship that can only grow with time spent together.

Jesus' salvation for His beloved is the beginning of a beautiful relationship of love, inspiration, dedication and honor.   To give you the affirmation of His love.

Your Prince awaits.  What is your response?  

Song of Songs 2:10 "My Love spoke and said to me, 'Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with Me.'"

Some friends of mine are struggling right now.  Many friends.  Many problems.  Heath.  Stress.  Worry.  The death of a beloved parent.

It seems as though the burden of what is going on in their lives is too much.  I wrote about this yesterday.  I had to have a little crying time while I was praying for and thinking of my friends.   I couldn't help it.

None of us will ever have a pain-free life.  Poets have written about the pain, novels have been based on it.  But that life is purely make-believe.  Those of us who seek that life will be thoroughly disappointed.  Disillusioned.

But then I am reminded of His great love.  His captivating, rich, full, powerful love and it's for me.  And my friends.

A love that brings hope.  Peace.  Comfort.

An overwhelming love that He is in control.  He has never lost sight of my friends or me.  Not even for a moment. 

My way of planning life is not His way.  I know that.

When I look back on my life and see His fingerprints on it, I know that His way always works best.   He heals the wounded spirit.  He comforts the saddened.  He inspires the longing heart. 

His love overwhelms.  Even through the times we feel the most alone.

The urge to break down and bawl my eyes out for a few moments is overwhelming me at the moment.

And I don't know why.

Well, actually, I do.  It's because I have become aware over the past few weeks of some very serious needs of people I know.  Names from five different states have been added to my prayer list this week. 

Now I have several hard and fast rules in my life and one of them is that no one cries alone in my presence.   I have stuck like glue to that rule.  It shows.  Little mascara raccoon eyes. 

I have been praying with people.  Talking with people.  Laughing with some and crying with others.  It's all part of the job, I guess.  Ministry gets messy.

As I was tossing and turning last night I was thinking about the people who need to have God show up in their lives in a big way.  And then it hit  me...

I was doing exactly what I tell people to never do... holding on to the problems.  Keeping the needs in my mind and heart.  What I should be doing is handing them over to God.  Giving him the names of my friends and telling Him I fully rely on Him to meet those needs.  I reminded God of His promises.  His safe-keeping.  His faithfulness.   I know He knows all these things already, but I wanted to make sure He knew I remembered them.

So I did.  I gave Him the problems one by one.

I lifted each friend by name.  I gave Him their list of needs and reminded God that His plan for them was for good and not for harm.  (Jeremiah 29:11)   It's a theme I have been trying to live by since some time in the beginning of 2011.  His plan.  Not mine. 

I am working at making myself available to Him for His purposes.  Leaving my to do list with some room in it to allow Him to work through me.   And boy, has He. 

This is how it works in the ministry:  someone comes to me and asks for prayer.  I pray with them.  Then when we are no longer together, I pray for them until I hear it's no longer necessary to do so, for whatever reason.   Sounds easy, huh?

Unless I let their burdens become my burdens.  It happens. 

Then I have to cry to relieve the stress.  Until that still, small voice speaks to my heart and tells me He is pretty amazing.  If I will let Him have the burden, He can and will carry it for me better than I can ever do alone.  (Matthew 11:30 -- my yoke is easy...).  

I just need to make that a priority.  I need to remember ministry isn't about me.  it's about Him.  He can do it better than I ever will.  As long as I remember to let Him.

It's always good for a pastor to remember, God is in charge of the stuff only God can do.  It's not my responsibility.

What I can do is... add waterproof mascara to the shopping list.

There are only three things of which I am afraid:  1)  Near miss car accidents; 2)  bats; and 3) mice.  Let's be honest -- numbers two and three are so close to the same thing they might as well be the same thing so we'll add a new item 3:  things that go bump in the night.  Especially when I am home alone.

Near miss car accidents because they are so... sudden.  You're driving along and BAM! something jumps out of nowhere, like a tree, and you almost hit it.

Bats and mice... because they're bats and mice.

Then... the things that go bump in the night.  That noise that sounds like... something.... and because it's what scares me, I don't go and check it out.  Why would I?  It made a noise.  

It's the fear of the unknown.  The car that swerves in front of you... the vermin crawling out from a hole in the ground or swooping on you when you least expect it.  And the unknown noise.  All pretty scary things.

I know the root of my problem when it comes to noises -- too many horror movies as a young girl.  I watched them all:  babysitter in the house alone, or the weird guy who hasn't changed out of his hockey mask after practice, the crazed lunatic with a chain saw.  And the junk that my mind absorbed during those movies has stuck with me these 40... er...20.... ummmm... ok, fine, 25 years later.

Let's be honest here... it's really not the fear of the unknown as much as it is the garbage with which I filled my head for years.  And years.  Ok... and years.

Psalm 101:3 I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless.  Like movies of things that make me afraid.    I need to guard what I read, watch on television and movies.  Those things stick with a person.

I know it's all make believe, but some of it sure seems real enough.  It seems real because of all of the highly-paid special effects people in Hollywood.  Real enough to make me afraid when I'm home.  Alone.  At night.  There's no way I'm going to get up and see what it is.

It's probably a mouse.  And those things are scary.